Tag: snow

You Be the Judge: A few doors down from me lives a couple with 3-year-old twins. After the storm, they dug out their car. On Sunday they had to run an errand with their kids. On their return one hour later, they found that someone had parked in the space they cleared. They did not recognize the car. They left a note on the windshield, explaining that they had cleared the spot, and that they needed to park in front of their house for the sake of their young kids. Later in the day, they noticed that the note had been removed from the windshield and torn up. The remnants were visible inside the stranger's car. I learned all this while shoveling out my own car Sunday afternoon. The mother of the twins was relating it to a plow driver she had flagged down. "Money!" she yelled, and the man pulled over. They did not want help clearing out a new spot, she explained. Then her husband took over. "I want to bury him," he said, while gesturing to the stranger's car. It didn't take long. The plow made a few passes and rammed a mountain of solid-pack snow against the driver's side of the stranger's car. Then the couple went inside. About 40 minutes later, a young man walked past me, got up to the buried car, and yelled (very loudly, with children just across the street) "F**K!" He got into his car through the passenger side, started it, tried to gun his way from the spot and saw that his car was going nowhere. He walked back up the street and asked me, "What happened here?" I said I didn't know, and that plows had been coming regularly up and down the street. He asked if I had an extra shovel, which I didn't. So he trudged to the hardware store a few blocks away and came back with a new shovel. Then he started shoveling out his car, not by throwing the snow in some kind of pile, but by whipping it into the middle of the street. When I went inside 20 minutes later, he was still working. I can't decide if this is an example of society working perfectly, or horribly. Snowed in Sometimes weather drives us to horrible things, like cannibalism. On Saturday, I suffered a much worse fate: I had to watch "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button." Oh god. The screams ... (February 8, 2010)

Snow Day, Feb. 6: Enjoy! Here's an evil snowman, Andrew Jackson, and two guys PUSHING A BUS. On the (Snowy) Town Hey -- guy jogging in two feet of snow. I like jogging. I came to it later in life, and I am no expert. My bosoms heave a great deal as I jog. But I, like the Doobie Brothers, sincerely understand the joys of getting off the treadmill and taking it to the streets. I even jog outside when it's cold! But you are an idiot. We get it, you're in shape. Now, you aren't like that jerk across the street jogging in short shorts. But that's where you're headed. Slow down before you get there. Hey -- people in snow shoes. We've all had buyer's remorse. Most of the instances in my life involve t-shirts with logos, but I've even sunk $300 on a 19-inch flat screen TV with a crappy picture. My boogie board hasn't gotten much use in the last 18 years. And hey, we want to get some use out of those money pits. But as I make my way through Chinatown, I can't help but notice that I am outpacing you wearing low-end trail-runners with severely eroded tread. And, let's be frank, I'm not THAT athletic. That should be a hint. Hey -- people wearing cross-country skis in the city. You're making the snow shoe people look good. Hey -- guy walking around town in the snow judging people like a jerk. Stop looking so handsome, you scamp. (February 7, 2010)