If you're a booker or corporate type looking for a boring, regular Chris White web site that's slightly less confusing, you can see one right here.

Summer Lovin'

June 26: Here's a revolting development ... Chris has an actually mini-tour set up for "I Take Requests." This August, he's taking his show to Little Falls, NY, Boston, MA and Waitsfield, VT, with the possibility of a few more shows on the way. It's all very upsetting, and our only comfort is that he's sticking to cozier venues. I Take Requests info

May 29: Chris has been quiet on the video front lately. Or so we thought until he unveiled this new tape from the Hawaiian National Spelling Bee. He's probably bitter over some kind of spelling bee loss earlier in his life. Yeah, that's it.

February 10: Well, crap. Not only was "I Take Requests V" in Indian Head a huge success, Chris has ALREADY announced plans for "I Take Requests 6" back at the DC Improv Lounge. This is just horrible news ... Whatever you do, don't click on over to the Improv site to buy tickets.

Welcome True Believers

You've reached the Web site dedicated to proving that comedian Chris White sucks. There are so many reasons we can't get into right now -- start off by reading our Mission Statement, then click around a bit and wallow in the suckiness. You'll see what we're talking about soon enough, and when you're ready, we've got a pitchfork with your name on it. The day of liberation is coming ...

And by the way, don't be fooled by his appearance on "Last Comic Standing 5" (it was only 2 minutes long). Or his continual airplay on satellite radio. Or his longstanding tradition of quality and excellence. The guy sucks.

Why Chris Sucks: His mother always wanted a girl, but he insisted on being a boy. What a phallocentric jerk.

Legal Stuff: If you have questions about this Web site, why? You should spend your time questioning the moral nature of any god who would let Chris White exist. But anyhow ... copyright 2009, Chris White Sucks Inc.